Why is it so hard to have a successful relationship?

We all start into a relationship with an idealistic viewpoint of it being successful but sometimes we forget it takes work from both people. These great relationships do not come easily. Even with the seemingly perfect person you have to work continuously on your relationship and find ways to improve it. It is too easy to settle into a routine and expect the relationship to stay strong but many of us know that is not reality. There are keys that I have discovered to a successful relationship. I have listed a couple below but if you struggle with relationships I can help you so call me.

 1. Communication: I know for myself if I cannot open up and be heard by my partner than my relationship is not as solid as it should be. This works both ways.

If my partner says something that hurts my feelings (even when it is unintentional) and I don’t talk about it, I find myself getting annoyed at everything they do. I start nitpicking but I know better. It is not those little things bothering me but that one thing that they said that hurt my feelings and I kept it bottled up inside.

Without two-way communication, many of us hold a grudge and that is not productive for a healthy relationship. One important rule is to talk in a respectful manner and own your own thoughts and feelings without being judgmental. It requires respect of the other individual and once you have shared your perspective it is crucial to be open to the other persons point. Be a good listener!

 2. Honesty: being honest is foundational to a healthy relationship. Even so called “white lies” are not healthy for a solid relationship. This may sound easy but it is not always easy to share your thoughts and feelings with someone when you don’t know what kind of reaction you might get. This gets easier with practice of both sides.

If you struggle in your relationship try counselling because it is a safe place to work on some of those sticky points.

Sonya